Slut skills are useful in every country.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
