Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
