i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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