Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
