omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Randomize
