when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Yo dont text me then not text me
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
There's always time for handjobs
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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