I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
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