I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
one might say we're banned from that church
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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