She's JV to your varsity
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
