I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
