New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
