im gay
i know
yea but for you.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
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I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
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