all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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