She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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