I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
