Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
one two three fourrrrnication!
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
