I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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