she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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