We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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