Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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