belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
