Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
