I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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