Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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