just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
