i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
