I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
