There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
