I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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