You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize
