she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Randomize
