And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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