You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Reggie can tackle my bush.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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