I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How drunk are you?
Completed.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
