the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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