I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
