I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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