we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize