i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
