in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
