Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
