We named our party play list daddy issues
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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