and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
