you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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