garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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