her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Someone shattered a urinal.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
