McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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