you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
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