Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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