i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
This is classic penis vs brain.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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